Okay, here's what you've been waiting for: Results! First off, thanks to everyone who participated... 628 of you, including 14 women! I'm warning you now, though: This won't be just a "print the results" sort of thing. I'm gonna highlight a lot of the comments and suggestions that you guys offered, and hopefully offer some explanations for why (or why not) you won't see your recommendation in a future SlapstickStuff vid.
So let's get started! First the good news: Lots of you visit the site, and you've been doing it for a while! Only 2% had never visited before taking the survey, while 81% have been checking it out for over a year. And you seem to enjoy it: 45% rank it "well above average," and another 44% as "above average." Possibly a leading question, but hey, I'll take it...
Now the bad news: Most of you ain't buyin'! Hey, that's alright, it's pretty much what I had expected. (But now I have solid number confirmation.) In case you're wondering, only a few are heavy buyers of downloadable clips (12% have bought 10 or more) or DVDs (7% bought 10 or more). More have bought between 1 and 9 total (33% for DLs, 18% for DVDs). And by far the biggest numbers occur in the "never bought" category for both DLs (55%) and DVDs (75%).
Which brings up an interesting argument: Do you weigh the opinions of those who never buy as much as the opinions of your best customers? Or, in other words, do you appease the audience you have, or do you try to change things radically to bring in the audience you don't? In the case of this survey, I honestly took every comment seriously, no matter who it came from. But I also have to assume that after three years, if someone was gonna buy something from the site, they would have by now. So I treated this survey as a way to find small changes and improvements to bring to the site, rather than the blueprint for a massive overhaul. I know some of you were afraid of radical change following the survey, but rest assured: The flavor and spirit of SlapstickStuff will remain unchanged. For better or worse.
Now moving on....
The questions about factors causing you to buy (or not buy) from SlapstickStuff were probably more illuminating for the "Other" comments rather than the actual results. When you buy, the model's looks are the big factor (21%) and of course that's highly opinionated! Also scoring high were pies (17%), slime (14%), and free pictures (15%), with everything else 8% or less. The "not buy" factors were usually "short on funds" (27%, and it's a copout but, again, I'll take it!) and talent-specific things like unappealing model (11%) or wardrobe (9%). However, there were more slime fans dissatisfied (8%) than pie fans (6%), for reasons I'll address later.
Now we get to the specific elements, and here I'll begin discussing the comments I received with surveys, either in the "Other" section or at the survey's end. First with pies: Shaving cream is good (40% definitely or probably buy), but Cool Whip or bakery ones are better (68% def/prob). However, I think I'm tricking a lot of you, since I basically use shaving cream variations for most of my throwing and self-pies, and both those elements received high marks: Throwing was 61% def/prob and self-pies were 49%. As for comments....
--"Type of pies could be varied."
--"Real pies all the time would be better. I'd be willing to see fewer pies per model if it meant that all were real."
--"Pies on top of pies are a waste. I'd rather see fresh hits on a clean face every time."
--"Different colour pies would be a great addition."
--"I like the runnier, messier pies."
Okay, first off: I'm a pie guy. That's my favorite thing to see. That said... I like variation too, but I also balance that against what has the best chance of working for a skit. For me, shaving cream is a better substance for throwing and (once I "mess" with it, hee hee) it creates that "gooey" look that many of you love. In its regular form, it also works best for maximum crust coverage which goes hand in hand with self-pies. Bakery pies are indeed expensive, but I'm not opposed to using them: In fact, I would use them more if I had a bakery making me consistently great ones! As it stands now, most of my bakery pastries in the past have come from Wal-Mart or PetRitz and the results are erratic. (See Toshia's first-ever pie hit in SS27... To this day it still breaks my heart...) Cool Whip is better but again, not always consistent... Sometimes it falls off too quick, sometimes it melts in the heat. As for all clean hits.... Time and money make that an impossible dream... although I think water helps. (More on water later.)
What I'm trying to do in the newer scenes is variations. Usually the initial scene will start with mostly edible pies, throwing in a few shaving cream ones for effect. I don't enjoy the "massive buildup" of shaving cream anymore, though, so often I'll follow those with another Cool Whip to "alieviate" that problem! I'm also using more substances in the pies--different puddings, cherry filling, etc--to vary it even more. The colored pies usually appear in throwing scenes, and again those are mostly shaving cream but with that gooey effect. A slime-intensive scene tends to have mostly shaving cream as well, for the simple reason that Cool Whip doesn't stick well after slime.
Based on this survey, I'll try to start adding more real pies to the mix, and hopefully find a bakery nearby that can help me out. Please let me know if you're enjoying the different pudding mixes and the new cherry pies, as those seem to come out well IMHO.
Next, slime.... and how to read between the lines. Poured slime is the big winner here (58% def/prob), beating out chocolate slime (45% def/prob) and tossing (37% def/prob). So far, so good, right? Except that it's not that simple with slime. Based on my emails over the years, I know that slime fans aren't my main audience, but they do make up a sizable--and very opinionated--percentage. When they like a scene, I know it... because the DL numbers skyrocket. If they don't.... It's basically a non-starter. So for slime, I had to toss stats out the window and rely more on comments. (Case in point: Only 7% said they would "not buy" a scene when the model has hair up.... but I know from HARD experience that a slime scene with a model's hair up really doesn't sell at all. So 93% of the slime fans were basically lying on that question...)
--"I don't dig the watery slime, not the amount just the weird consistency."
--"You should dedicate an entire video to slime."
--"I think the slime needs to be more chunky and less runny. Also, multiple slimings in one scene. I don't mean just two or three, but six or seven would be great as well. Also, I would like to see the models seated and not standing up!"
--"Honestly, I'm not really that into the thrown slime/water. It does create a pretty cool slapstick effect, but it just doesn't really do it for me."
--"A slightly less-thick consistency of slime... I would also like to see slightly less emphasis on looking straight up during slimings."
--"Definitely a slime fan. I love your slime. Keep coming back for more."
So a few opinions.... Here's what I can tell you: My personal favorite slime is the thick, heavy stuff that comes down and covers well. (Deana's slime in SS25 for instance.) However, I will be incorporating the chunky "YCDTOTV" recipe into some future videos, and we'll see what the reaction is. It won't be every slime but probably half of them during the main slime scene.
I rarely tell the model to look up (unless she's definitely looking down for a long time) so I don't think it's a "forced" thing if you actually watch the scenes. Usually that first slime only coats the hair and leaves the face relatively clean (like Kathleen's newest), then the rest of the slimes cover the face. I do love the gag of the model getting one sliming full-on in the face, though. That won't be going away. Ditto the tossed slime... Apparently it's not as popular, but it's a cool look IMHO (almost like a liquid pie) and a nod to the UK method of tossing gunge. Again, it's all about variations. (Which means some models sit and some stand... Usually that boils down to whether or not I feel like cleaning off the stool afterwards....)
Will I make a brand-new "all slime" video? Probably not. I prefer the pies too much. Plus (almost) every model I work with dislikes the slime (it's not easy on the hair) and I doubt any of them could handle 15+ slimings in one day. You can usually expect one solid slime scene per video, possibly more if we shoot a lot of footage, with slime compilations occuring as we amass the scenes!
Water was an "eh" factor.... 27% would "def/prob buy" for pouring, 22% for tossing, with the majority basically ambivalent. That said, a lot of you like to see a model clean (semi-clean?) before another round of mess, and water works well for this in the context of a single scene. Of course, it works better outside, which is why you see that gag appear more frequently in the summer.
"Other food items" got another middling response (28% def/prob), but perhaps my question was too vague. I got requests for everything from beans to cake frosting, but I suspect any other food elements will happen organically and solely for that scene. (Eggs just made an appearance in SS47, for instance. I didn't really see any great numbers though, so that's not much incentive for me to return to eggs anytime soon. The cardinal rule: If you like something, buy it... And then you'll probably see it again!)
Finally, non-messy gags was a big "no effect" factor (28%), although a couple comments recommended more pratfalls, so I might have to work on those. I'm thinking a well-timed fall into a giant cake or bowl of cream at some point would be a fair compromise?....
Multiple women. The one thing EVERYONE agrees on. (71% def/prob buy, less than 3% def/prob not buy... haha...) Those of you who know my scheduling woes can sympathize with just how hard it is to get two women to appear in the same place at the same time, but rest assured I do have plans for some shoots coming soon. A few mentioned this idea--"I'd like to see scenes with two women where only one of them gets the pies"--so that may happen. It's more a logistics/time thing, as what would (invariably) occur would be shooting a scene like the one mentioned above, followed by a solo scene with the clean girl to maximize the time. I thought the SS42 scene was a good step in the direction of one girl getting the short end of the stick for a long time, so that idea may resurface as well.
Which brings us to the polarizing element: Men. Co-ed scenes. BOY there were some heated opinions here! First off.... Men alone are a 51% "definitely not buy," which is pretty strong, whereas co-ed scenes hit 43% with "definitely not" and "probably not" combined. But here's the twist: The 6% who said they would "definitely buy" a co-ed scene? They weren't kidding. They definitely bought the SS45 co-ed scene. (Literally. Every person. I have the numbers.) And it doesn't end there, as these are just a few of MANY comments:
--"There's not enough males getting pied/slimed!"
--"Lose the men."
--"You DEFINITELY need more males involved in the slapstick!"
--"Factors that would make me SERIOUSLY consider purchasing is an increase in the number of coed scenes."
--"I feel like SlapstickStuff is changing. I'm definitely not a fan of co-ed pieing or male pieing in general."
OKAY... Here's the bottom line: I am not planning to do a ton of co-ed or male scenes. Or even a fair amount. But neither will I rule out future scenes as the opportunity arises. What I discovered from the SS45 scene is there is a market out there who wants to see this particular variation. I'm not going to be hunting down male models, but heck, if the model brings her BF along anyway and he wants to get involved, why not film that? Or if she has a burning desire to take revenge on me, why not use that?
Rest assured that SlapstickStuff is not changing. We're just going to (occasionally) offer more variation. And believe me when I say this: A model fresh off of pieing me, or some other stupid dude, is a much happier model. And that makes for a much better video. And hopefully all of you can appreciate that.
Okay, as we reach the end of Part One, it's as good a time as any to address the 800-lb gorilla in the room. Namely.... moving out of the PG realm. You might've noticed that no question addressed the idea of models going naked, or topless, or any other adult themes... BUT I did leave the survey open-ended for comments. And far and away the greatest majority were focused on that topic. This comment is pretty representative:
"You appear to offer a high quality product and the clips and promotional trailers are, I think, very good indeed - most commendable, very entertaining and enjoyable. I particularly like the way the women express their enjoyment in getting thoroughly messed up and welcome being hit with numerous pies. Great "slapstick stuff" indeed. But why no nudity? Is this not a category where you could include some (eventually) naked routines in your otherwise excellent portfolio?"
Well, in one word.... No. "Never" is a strong word, but I'm about 99% certain you will not see anything beyond a PG rating at SlapstickStuff. That means no nudity, no bare breasts, and basically nothing adult. You will see some very attractive and very sexy women, wearing very attractive and sexy clothes, including some outfits that don't leave too much to the imagination! And you will possibly curse me from thousands of miles away... or at least wonder why, with so many revealing outfits, doesn't a shoot just go that "extra step" further?
There's a variety of reasons, but this journal is too long as is, so I'll give you three:
1) My personal beliefs. I'm not the morality police, and I don't judge what others like... But, for me, I never want SlapstickStuff to be viewed as "porn." I know MANY of you will argue this point (and believe me, I still have the occasional crisis of conscience myself), but I really do want the site to simply be an updated, modern, over-the-top version of the same stupid messy slapstick I loved as a little kid. And there was never any nudity on those shows. So it doesn't feel right to have it now. Sure, I do try to make things sexier--especially when I'm lucky enough to get the right model--but nudity is a line in the sand that I won't cross, no matter how much extra money I could be making. For me, it's not worth it.
2) My model's personal beliefs. There's a fairly simple reason why I (modestly) believe I'm able to get so many attractive women to do these shoots... and it's because I guarantee there will be NO nudity whatsoever. That's a huge line in the sand for many models as well, and once your portfolio includes nude work, you're losing a lot of prospective talent. (And no, it's not enough to say, "Some of my models do nudity, but you don't have to." Your work speaks for itself, and models aren't stupid.) This also extends to the wardrobe for a shoot as well: If a model is wearing modest clothes in every scene, that's what she feels comfortable in. A lot of you love bikini scenes, but those are only shot with models who agree to them. (And sorry guys, Toshia continues to shoot down my bikini requests! But in a nice way...) And the same rule applies to costumes: Amber from SS36 wore the "tux" outfit for the Intros skits after trying on the white top/shorts combo and deciding she wasn't comfortable wearing that on camera. As a producer, I will always respect the wishes of the people I work with above everything. And I usually find I end up with better results that please everyone that way.
3) My audience's personal beliefs. Which is another way of saying: There's plenty of sites out there offering nudity... sex... triple-X footage... whatever. I've positioned SlapstickStuff as an alternative to that, and I'm proud to say I've found an audience who shares my vision. These were some of the other comments I received in this survey:
--"Never sell out like other sites and go nude."
--"I'm glad you don't go with nudity or porn. There's enough of that out there, and frankly, the PG/G stuff is more fun."
--"The PG-only content and emphasis on comedy is a major reason why yours is the only site I am comfortable buying from."
And I've been getting emails like those from Day One. Couples who check the site together... Guys who got their wives/girlfriends into pies and slime through my videos.... Heck, people who appreciate a good G-rated slapstick scene. I know it disappoints some of you, but I have no plans for SlapstickStuff to change in this regard. It may be a tiny niche, but it's mine!
Alright, thanks for reading through some of these results (and my long-winded commentary and explanation). Part Two will follow soon to pick up the rest of the Survey... but probably not right away! Thanks again to everyone who filled out a form and expressed their opinion. Please feel free to keep post comments below. Is there something else you want to see? Have the newer scenes moved in a better (or worse) direction for you? Did I interpret the survey results correctly? Am I still ignoring your favorite slapstick element? Let me know, and hopefully we can keep this dialogue going!
All the best,
Rich
www.SlapstickStuff.com
Monday, March 12, 2007
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